Sometimes the universe conspires to turn your peachy day into apocalypse. Here are some instances:
1. The MRT elevator suddenly stopped (halt) in the middle of it’s snail-like ascend to the 3rd floor. You are stuck with 7 other people. O yes..the stench. Au Naturale! It stopped for more than a minute. Claustrophobia closing in!
2. You’re wearing the perfect white blouse. But while at lunch your clumsy officemate “accidentally” upon opening the soy sauce container drizzled some on you, turning your white blouse into stool brown. Wala bang kalamansi jan?
3. You’ve patiently waited for the elevator to land in the ground, as you step inside 11 other heavy weights rushed. The OVERLOAD sign screamed for help. No one is guilty enough to step outside and just wait for the next ride. The NERVEs!!!!!
4. You hailed a cab and asked to be taken to your destination. As soon as you closed the door, the driver either:
a. Ask for extra money because it’s already late.
b. Ask for extra money because he forgot to gas up.
c. Ask where you are going again and directions to go there.
d. just be a plain pain-in-the-a** who rants and vents about politics and wowowee.
5. In the middle of your slumber, you suddenly woke up thinking that you’re already running late only to find out that you’ve just been asleep for an hour from the time that you’ve closed your eyes.
6. You’re wearing killer heels and was asked to floorwalk. By the time that you’re done, you’re toes have bled up.
7. You are interviewing an applicant -who, in the middle of the interview—farts! Will you laugh? Will you act as if nothing happened?
8. You called a fast food chain to have your food delivered.. Thirty minutes later the rider comes up to your floor, opens his bag and finds that it was empty. He scratches his head, apologizes 10 or more times and says that he will be back immediately. After several minutes of hunger strike, he comes back with the wrong order. Is he deliberately trying to measure my BOILING POINT?????
9. You are in the middle of impersonating your boss when he suddenly appeared.
10. While in the middle of floorwalking, you slipped right in front of your crush. Upon seeing this, he, like what all gentltemen do, comes to the rescue to assist your clumsy ass. He then asks if you’re alright and like the spastic that you are—grinned and hurriedly tried to come up with a lame come-back joke. But you ended up saying ” SAVE!!!” What? Save??? You could have said something like ” Inggat ka, madulas e!” But why BASEBALL? WTF